Friday, March 13, 2009

Doody Balls

I woke up yesterday morning feeling constipated, but certain that with a bit of fiber, I could bring my creation to full fruition. After taking my morning meds, I ingested a few fiber capsules. With that, I was set and evacuated for a short time. I knew there would be more to come, so walked a bit around the house knowing that exercise is a good way to "get things going".

I'd already go through all three of the weekly rags I get, so was perusing Billboard's Book of Number One Hits while on the throne; It devotes a full page to every number one hit from 1955 ("Rock Around the Clock") to 1988 ("Together Forever" by Rick Astley). I bought the publication close to 20 years ago. You know you're pretty hard up for reading material when you start looking over CD liner notes.

As luck would have it, I was off work for the day, so was able to spend most of my time in a bathrobe. In the end, I probably ingested about 8 FibCaps. I've said it before, but those things are miracle workers.

When I feel like I have to go, but can't quite get it out, 2 tabs makes everything alright. They're like InstaLaxatives.

In the early evening, I dug around the basement for a couple pages I'd written back in '05 about Brandy, our Saint Bernard. I found both pages and had a chuckle being reminded of things I'd forgotten about:

"I remember when it would snow hard, I'd go in the front to shovel and Bran would sit there eating as much snow as she could."

I know I could drop some more friends off at the pool this evening if I just took a couple more tablets. Destiny awaits...

1 comment:

Rocketstar said...

Laxitives scare me, if the doody doesn't want to come out, i just wait but I'm pretty regular.