Saturday Night's Alright For Bowling

This past Saturday was spent in celebration of Shanon's 33rd birthday (which is actually today). We went to Best Buy and I gave him 20 bucks there telling him to buy whatever he wanted. He chose the Omen gift set which includes all 4 70's Omen movies as well as the remake from last year. I wasn't too big on going to a movie (just not much on that I was interested in seeing), so we headed to the bowling alley on north Broadway. There was league bowling all day there, so we made a call to the other lanes in town to make sure they had openings. They did and it wasn't just regular bowling. It was of the moonlight variety, you know, the lights turned down, the neon strobes turned up, music like "Dancing Queen" and "Barbie Girl" playing.

I hadn't bowled in about 2 years, but was up for a couple games. I basically just try to throw the bowl smack dab in the middle (who doesn't). There were some wuzzy teenagers in the next lane who disgusted me, though. They had bumpers up, so even if they got a strike, it didn't count in my mind. That's not bowling as far as I'm concerned. When I was a kid, we didn't have no stinkin' bumpers. If you got a gutter ball every frickin' time, that's the way it was until you learned how to shoot it straight. That's the way it was and we liked it that way!!

I bowled pretty decent in that first game. I got 2 strikes. Shanon got one. I was using positive thinking as I rolled the ball (not unlike what the current best-seller "The Secret" encourages. I haven't read the book, only heard about its philosophies. I've been a proponent of positivity for years). Before I threw the ball, I slowed down my breathing and tried to picture the ball hitting the head pin. Obviously, it didn't work every time, but hey, at least I beat Shanon (I got a 90 while he had around 75). At one point, when he was shooting extra poorly, Shanon said he was gonna go look for another ball (don't ya love it when someone is not doing well and they blame the equipment?)

We played one more game and he did even worse (about 62 or so). I, on the other hand, really hit my stride. I got 2 strikes and 4 spares (all the spares came in the second half of the game). For those spares, I was really visualizing the ball hitting the remaining pins as I threw it. I wound up with a 133. We had built up quite an appetite by this point, so headed to my favorite restaurant, Friday's. We got there a little after 5 before it got too busy. I said I'd treat him to whatever boos he wanted, so he ordered a tall Michelob light. We told the waitress that it was his b-day in a couple days, so she came out with a few other girls and sang the Friday's birthday song after wrapping the string from 3 helium-filled balloons around his wrist. His dessert was some kind of apple pie-ice cream mix with caramel (I abstained).

He still wanted to keep the party going. So I agreed to going to a movie (I just received my hundred passes, but didn't want to start using them yet, so brought a filled punch card that I was able to use to get in free, anyway). We both wanted to see a comedy, but I had already seen "Reno 911" and didn't want to see "Night at the Museum". We had both heard terrible things about "Norbit", but were willing to give it a try (getting in for free helped in this regard). We had about 20 minutes before the show started, so we went to the bathroom and wandered a bit.

I was hoping that it would have a few laughs, but knew it had one of the lowest ratings ever on Rotten Tomatoes (9%). We sat near the front and watched the previews. Then came the feature. It started by showing Norbit as a child (I got a few chuckles). Murphy has 3 roles in the film. He's plays the nerdy Norbit, the 300-pound plus female Rasputia, and an older Asian man.

In the first few minutes, I was fearing that the movie was gonna be almost completely mirth-free, but as I watched the first half-hour, I started to laugh out loud (lol) a few times. I was getting the most fun from the things Rasputia was saying and doing. I loved it how when she and Norbit got in their little Pacer, she always thought that Norbit had moved the seat up when really it was she who was steadily gaining weight. She didn't like to hear about her weight, so Norbit offered that the car was probably shrinking. At this suggestion, she said "Yes, it has been raining a lot lately". There was also a lot of politically incorrect humor in the movie, such as this exchange between Norbit and the old man:

Mr. Wong: Remember, black people run very fast. But problems run faster.

Norbit:...That's kinda racist.

Mr. Wong: Yes, Wong very racist. Don't like black. Don't like Jew, either. But black and Jew love Chinese food. Go figure.

Eddie Griffin was in the film, but I didn't laugh at anything he did (surprising since I loved him in '02's "Undercover Brother"). Marlon Wayans was also in the film and did provide a few laughs. Overall, I had a great time and give this movie a B+ (Shanon enjoyed it as well). This film may have led in some ways to Murphy not getting an Oscar a couple weeks ago, but if he hadn't lost, then I wouldn't have won my $100 and 100 movie tickets, so don't expect me to cry about it. "Norbit" is closing in on $100 million, though, which tells me that I'm not the only one deriving pleasure from it. Don't get me wrong. It's no "Borat", but you could do much worse on a Saturday night.